"I promised your brothers that I would keep you out of trouble. And that's what I intend to do. If that means keeping tabs on you, so be it. Besides, haven't you learned by now that I like to get my way?"
"I'm not one of your many submissives, Gabe. I don't work like that and you know it. I swear. You and my brothers are power hungry and can't stand for a second to let someone else be in control, can you?" She didn't wait for a response.
"That's your issue, by the way. Not mine."
She took another deep breath before she continued. "I mean, don't get me wrong. I needed a place to hunker down and think for a while and I appreciate you helping me out with that. But I'm ready now to rejoin the world. I'm going home."
"Is that so?"
She nodded. "For sure."
"Okay, if everything is so great as you put it, let me ask you one question. If you can answer it, then I will let you go."
Her heartbeat sped up as she tried to imagine what one question he could possibly ask. What one thing could she tell him that would make him believe her?
"Did you kill Reverend Lewis?"
The shock of the question hit her across the face as violently as if he'd slapped her. She sucked in air and bent at the waist. Please, this couldn't be happening. Her chest suddenly ached with a pain so fierce she wanted to scream.
"That's what I thought."
His statement caught her off guard. Enough for her to raise up and stare daggers at him. Anger surged through her, pushing some of the hurt away.
"That's what you thought? Are you freaking kidding me? What the hell, asshole? You took me in, you made me feel safe again and now this? I've had it. I'm not going to listen to any more conjecture or innuendo and I'm certainly not going to stand here and watch you doubt me. What kind of bullshit is that? I trusted you."
"No, you didn't," he replied as vehemently as she. "If you did, you wouldn't be sneaking out of my house right now. Or you wouldn't have stopped talking to me when you got scared. And you most certainly wouldn't be lying to me right now."
"I am not scared," she said. Although, if she was, she certainly wouldn't admit it. Deep down, in a place she refused to look, fear might be lurking.
But at the moment, she was annoyed and that's where she'd live for now if that's what it took to get through the day.
"And I wasn't sneaking. You left, I got up as instructed and now I'm leaving just as soon as you get out of my way."
"I didn't ask that question because I doubt you. I don't. In fact, I already know the answer."
She turned from looking over his shoulder and met his gaze. The clear blue ocean of his eyes gave her little clues to the man inside. For whatever reason, he learned long ago how to control his emotions.
She guessed it was a Dom thing, but she also suspected there was more.
That need to know him on some level she couldn't describe was what kept her coming back to him time and time again.
To a man she could never have.
"If you are so sure you know the answer, then why ask?"
"Because I wanted to see your reaction. You claim you're fine. You're not. I know the answer, but you do not. And that," he stroked his fingers down her cheek, "is why you are not fine. But if you'd let me, I can help. You just have to stop shutting me out. I am not them, Angel."
Nina shivered. So much of her wanted to give in. Especially when he called her 'Angel.' The husky tone it came out on melted her insides.
Oh, how she wanted to keep leaning on Gabe and allow him to take care of her. But she just couldn't. Her whole life had become about how well she stood on her own two feet. To backtrack now and rely on someone else any longer, it just didn't feel right. Not to mention unfair.
Gabe had his own life. As the manager of Purgatory Club and the Fire and Ice restaurant, he ran a tight, but busy ship.
He lived a life she couldn't be a part of.
She'd watched him too over the years.
Yes, he played hard at the club and demanded more than most would give, but in the end, he always sacrificed what he needed for others. She admired him for that, but it also broke her heart.
He'd already given his fair share to this family. It wouldn't be right to ask him for more. It was time to end this cycle.
"Don't be so sure that you know who I am," she said. "If I can't remember, then you can't be sure. Whatever you're thinking, you're making assumptions and that's not fair. There's only one person who knows the truth and she's not talking."
His hand wrapped around the back of her neck and tugged her closer. So close she could feel his body heat along her front. She closed her eyes and allowed that warmth to comfort her one last time. She couldn't help herself.
"You're wrong, Angel. There is one other person and she is standing right here."
His insistence that she could remember scraped against her pride.
"You think I haven't tried? No matter how many times I go back over that time in my life, it's blank. No, we have to get the truth from Tucker's mother. There's just no other way."
"It's all about trust, Nina. If you can let go of your stubborn pride and allow someone else to take control, your memories could come back. If you want them to, that is."
She bristled against his suggestion. "What's that supposed to mean? You think I'm doing this on purpose?"
She'd about had it with this conversation. She needed to escape.
He sighed. "That's not what I'm saying at all. What I am saying is that I believe you're at an impasse. You can't do this on your own. Now, you could go the therapist route or maybe hypnosis."
She wrinkled her nose at his suggestions. "I can't do that. Are you crazy?"
He nodded. "Agreed. We both know the situation is far too tenuous and explosive to be discussed with strangers. That's why I have another proposal."
Nina bit her lip. She had an idea where this was going and it was making her nervous.
"Maybe we should talk about this later," she said, looking wistfully at the door over his shoulder.
"Look at me, Nina. This is serious and it's effecting your life. This big plan of yours to bury your head in the sand isn't working. Tucker, Mason, and Levi aren't going away. They are concerned about you. They are going to keep pushing."
"They think I killed our father. How do you think that makes me feel? What is it about me that makes everyone think I'm capable of such a thing? I'm not that aggressive."
Gabe chuckled, the soft sound sliding against her skin. "Babe, you can be. But you're right, that doesn't make you a killer. But bad things happen to good people and it makes them do things they normally wouldn't do."
The way he said that and the look in his eyes as he did made her think he spoke from experience. What did that mean? Did he have secrets, too? Her big idea to get out of the house and try to talk to Savannah was beginning to deflate. The more he pushed at her, the more she wanted to avoid the truth.
"Okay, I'll bite. What exactly is it that you want me to do? How do you propose I get my memories back without Savannah’s help?”
He drew his lips into a thin, serious line. He also took another step closer, putting him well into her personal space.
"Submit to me. And by submit, I am not talking about sex. Although that could happen, too."
She started to protest and he held up his hand to stop her.
"No, let me finish. What I'm asking for is not simple and it is most definitely not easy. You've blocked old memories that are obviously traumatic. If you truly submit to me and learn to trust me, I believe we can unlock them."
"If you aren't talking about sex, then what are you talking about? I thought that's what the whole thing meant to you. I assumed taking control gave you pleasure."
Her last sentence came out a little too breathless, but it was impossible to stay neutral with this man anytime the topic of sex hit the table.
Sex with Gabe... While out of the question, the idea fueled her fantasies and had for years.
A small smile curved his lips. "I do enjoy being in control, but the real pleasure comes from the submissive and her desire to give me that control. For you, Nina, it can still be about pleasure, because that's normal when someone gets so deep inside your head that you temporarily let go. But make no mistake, the goal will be to help you break down the walls that are holding you back. Which leads us back to the only question left. Are you willing and ready to do whatever it takes to get to the truth?"
